mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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