Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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