It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
