I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
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