His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
