This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
