ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
