Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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