the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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