theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
