You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
It's rum buckets o'clock
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
