What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Randomize
