Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
