I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
