is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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