i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
