Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
