Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize
