I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
