p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
