I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
