This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
lets start a swedish sibling band together
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
