apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
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