when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
