Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
