is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize