honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize