I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
He better not be in your backpack
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
