Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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