Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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