I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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