We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
