can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
