Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
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