We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
