party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
