I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
