The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
