If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Randomize
