5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
