belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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