all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
