how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
