:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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