i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Rumble strips road head = magical
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
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