Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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