Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I'm both gender and math confused
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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