I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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