How'd it feel making her break her religion?
We need to rekindle our bromance
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
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