He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
