Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
why do cheetos always look like penises
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
